Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Today we must buy shoes. All three of my girls have outgrown theirs... at the same time. I'm rather pleased with the timing though because usually they do this mid-school year. AND I have a coupon for shoes. They want Heelys, but it isn't going to happen. Afterall, we're talking 6 pairs of shoes total because they need both athletic shoes and dress shoes. Sorry kidlets, next go-around in the cosmos you'd better be born to Bill Gates instead of Ma and Pa Kettle.

I found a new favorite knitting blog/read called Knitsisters. Many of you may already be privvy to the gaeity and humor these ladies provide, but I'm a newbie. I've spent over 1/2 hour this morning perusing the archives. Icarus in Vegas, hee hee. And knitters turned murderers/ terrorists. These gals are a hoot.

Wild Waves was fun. I enjoyed spending some one-on-one time with A2. Too bad cloning isn't viable yet. I'd take 5 copies. 1 for each of my daughters, 1 bad clone to do laundry and housework and 1 to spend time with B. Me, the original, would knit of course. Sorry, I digress. Wild Waves was fun, but horribly expensive, parking alone was $12! When we entered they did a thorough bag check. I congratulated the young man for taking security so seriously and his reply was that it was only a food and drink search. Huh? So I could have brought a WMD into the park but my bottle of water and bag of peanuts would have been confiscated! To say that the food inside was expensive is a gross understatement. AND although I could see no water fountains for drinking the park was willing to sell small bottles of water for $3.25 each. After paying $18.00 for a locker to stow away our towels, clothes and my empty wallet we proceeded to ride on several water slides, dry attractions and even one roller coaster. We left exhausted, wet and broke and arrived home in time to eat dinner and say goodbye to my Mom.

Mom drove all the way up from Grayland to spend the night and help us out. She kicked butt on the house and yard clean up and then baked chocolate chip cookies with A1 and A3 to boot. I'm both grateful for the help and impressed at her accomplishments... and she isn't even cloned. When I grow up I want to be like her!

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

14 Years!


August 15, a day that will live in infamy... okay, so maybe not. But 14 years ago B & I became official. Happy anniversary B!

This picture* was taken just before the limousine pulled away from the church. We ran (literally) down the aisle and kept going out the door. The driver whisked us across town to the reception where we were the first arrivals. We popped open a bottle of champagne and awaited our guests.

After 15 minutes no guests had arrived and the first bottle was empty, so we opened a second. Towards the bottom of the second bottle we began passing it back and forth, no need for silly little fluted glasses. Still no guests. Where had everybody gone? Maybe they were pissed because we ran out of the church without saying goodbye . Or maybe this was the wrong wedding reception and we were drinking somebody else's champagne.

Hick. No worries. People we recognized began arriving. They told us that the town's drawbridge had opened up to let a ship pass and that mechanical problems prevented it from closing again. But now the problem had been fixed and everyone arrived all at once... almost.

At this point the reception line, consisting of my parents, his parents and finally the two of us, was supposed to greet the guests. Neither set of our parents were there so B and I were the reception line. Due to the aforementioned consumption of champagne I remember nothing that was said and take no responsibility for crude or offensive remarks.

Other than the drawbridge incident and one table collapsing at the reception this was an uneventful beginning to our lives together.

*Disclaimer: I did NOT pick out this parade float/wedding dress. The story regarding this is long, boring and unremarkable.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Liq ui fy (lik'we fi') v. 1. to cause to have a liquid quality 2. process of aging body going to hell, most pronounced in females following childbirth.

I ro ny (i'ren e) n. 3. a combination of circumstances or a result that is the opposite of what is expected or might be considered appropriate

cow ard ice (kou erd is) n. 1. lack of courage; esp., shamefully excessive fear of danger

My middle daughter's Girl Scout troop has an outing to Wild Waves planned for Tuesday. I agreed months ago to attend this outing with her. Keep in mind that I have every intention of fulfilling this promise. . . I even coerced my mother into coming up and watching her sisters while the two of us go.

So today A2 informs me that she wants to ride the roller coasters. "Great!" says I.
She explained, "I can't go unless you ride too mom."
cricket, cricket
I answered, "I can't A*****, because of my disease."
"Why can't people with M.S. go, Mom?"
My answer to her was, "It's not because of the M.S., it's because of coward-s ." (Afterall, one of those actually turns you upside down.)
"You're going to ride the water slides with me aren't you mom?" she asked next.
I replied, "Sure, just as long as I can wear shorts and not a bathing suit."
cricket, cricket
"Why don't you wear a bathing suit mom?"
"Because my body has liquified and doesn't stay where it's supposed to anymore."
"Why, mom?"
My reply "Because I am 39, have 3 children and no time for spas, exercise or even showers on some days."
A2, "You don't love me or you'd wear a bathing suit." I find irony in this statement considering her gestation, birth and breastfeeding contributed to 1/3 of the liquidation process.

The compromise: I will wear a bathing suit under my shorts and shirt. Said overclothes will be removed if, and only if, there are rules expressly forbidding them. I will go on the smaller water slides and any other ride that doesn't loop-the-loop or drop straight down. When I'm old I had better be put in a good home.